Monthly Archives: October 2011

Unions Sweeten The Deal….Big Time.

I’m a turncoat.  Unions are great!  Look at all the great Halloween and candy treats made by members of the Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers International Union (BCTGM).  And then their snack foods by members of the United Food and Commercial Workers (UFCW); or even fruit and nuts from members of the United Farm Workers of America (UFW).  Go forth and eat union made!

Hershey Products Necco (New England Confectionery Company)
Hershey Kisses* Sweethearts
Hershey Syrups Mary Jane Peanut Butter Chews
Hershey Milk Chocolate Bar* NECCO Wafers/Necco Wafer Smoothies
Hershey Milk with Almond Bars Sky Bar
Hershey Special Dark Bars Clark Bar
Hershey Nuggets Canada Mints
Rolo Candy Cupboard
Hershey Kissables Thin Mints
Kit Kat Bars NECCO Assorted Junior Wafers
Carmello Bar Clark Junior Laydown Bag
Cadbury Fruit & Nut Bar Mary Jane Laydown Bag
Cadbury Roast Almond Bar Haviland
Cadbury Royal Dark Bar Mallow Cups
Cadbury Dairy Milk Bar Necco Peanut Butter Kisses
Jolly Ranchers  
Hershey Symphony Bar with Toffee Ghiradelli Chocolates
  All filled & non filled squares
Just Born non pariels
Peeps Chocolate chips
Mike & Ike  
Hot Tamales Gimbals Fine Candies
Peanut Chews JellyBeans
Jelly Beans Cherry Hearts
  Scotty Dogs
Jelly Belly’s Candy Company  
Jelly Bellies – also made in a non-union plants in Chicago/Taiwan Nestle
Chocolate Dutch Mints Nestle Treasures
Chocolate Temptations Laffy Taffy
dimples Kathryn Beich specialty candy
Goelitz Confections Baby Ruth*
Goelitz Gummi Butterfinger*
Pet Rat Pearson’s Nips
Pet Tarantula Famous Old Time Candies (gourmet chocolates)
Sweet Temptations Nestle Crunch  Butterfinger Crisp
Candy Corn  
Licorice Pearson’s Candy Co.
Malted Milk Balls Salted Nut Roll
Chocolate Coated Nuts, and Sours Nut Goodie
Sunkist Fruit Gel Slices Mint Patties
  Bun Bars
American Licorice  
Black & Red Vines Anabelles Candy Company
Strawberry Ropes Boston Baked Beans
  Jordon Almonds
Sconza Candies Rocky Road
Jawbreakers U-Nos
Chocolate Covered Cherries Look
Chocolate Big Hunk
Kraft Yogurt Nuts & Fruit
snack products  
Frito-Lay Chips Deluxe
Doritos Pecan Sandies
Rold Gold Cheez-it
Lays Potato Chips Vanilla Wafers
Nabisco Bachman
Corn Nuts Pretzels
Chips Ahoy! Jax Cheese Curls
Oreos Keystone Snacks Party Mix
Nutter Butter Cheese Curls
Vanilla Wafers Corn Chips
Graham Crackers  
  Orville Redenbacher

Pelosi: “Yes The Obama NLRB Should Shut Down The Boeing Plan In SC.”

HR Trick Or Treat: The Following Are Effective Immediately….

Avoid Overtime By Putting Everyone On A Salary And Calling Them Managers.

  • This is clearly the time to hold all by the hand, and treat everyone as equals; is it not?

Suspend Or Terminate Any Employee Shortly After Dubious Claims of Sexual Harassment.

  • Retaliate don’t Investigate.  In fact, quickly re-write the policy to read “Not only do we tolerate sexual harassment but we ask that you not report any incidents of sexual harassment.  Should you report incidents of sexual harassment to us, we shall immediately initiate a smear campaign against you.”

Terminate All Problem Employees By “Eliminating Their Positions” While Simultaneously Interviewing Their Replacements.

  • Avoid the difficult talk with problem employees and don’t confront performance problems as the reason for termination. There will be no investigation by the ex-employees’ attorneys into the “real reasons” for termination.

Give “Excellent” Performance Reviews To Marginal Employees.

  • Allow the marginal worker to build a record of “excellent” performance quickly as to ensure appropriate judgment subsequent our world’s “imminent and wrongful termination.”

Conduct All Sensitive Personnel Discussions By E-mail.

  • E-mail discussions are often quick, frank, open and unfiltered. E-mail is never truly deleted and can be recovered.  What better way to leave a lasting impression and documentation of employee performance.

Quickly Challenge All Terminated Workers On Their Claims for Unemployment Benefits.

  • Forget “for cause” & go straight to “misconduct’ including theft, damage to company property, drinking on the job, fighting with co-employees, and other serious violations.”

Allow Flex Schedules Just Because Employees Prefer Four 10-Hour Days.

  • Who cares about overtime claims and penalties such as a “three year reach back” now?

Hold All Employees’ Final Paycheck Until They Return Company Keys And Cell Phone.

  • Clearly these employees are not giving 72 hours’ notice, and nor shall they need to receive their paycheck within 72 hours.

Avoid Employment Laws Altogether By Making Everyone An Independent Contractor.

  • Simply treat everyone as an independent contractor and disregard all tax, workers’ compensation implications and potential wage and benefit liabilities.

Publish The Company’s Succession Plan Everywhere.

  • Pull back the curtain, open the kimono, and shout at the top of your lungs “it is what it is, it is what it is.”  Oz has spoken and there are no “High Potentials”, only “Two Promotables”,”Four Experienced Professionals”, and rest of you are “Manage-Outs.”

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